Friday, May 2, 2014

Sorry I'm Not Sorry...

Joining the lovely Alicia and Crystal Michelle for today's Sorry I'm Not Sorry link up! Personally, I don't think it gets much better then a link up on a Friday! Holla!

So, here's a what you’re going to do: Use the phrase “Sorry I’m not Sorry” Before each fill in the blank phrase below!  Then link up, comment on the host blog and one other blog that also link'd up too!
Super Easy and Fun! Oooooh, and BONUS...there's a Starbucks gift card for the best entry!

Sorry, I'm not sorry..... but, when I was a teen my mother had no idea that:
I was having SEX...well until she found that USED condom my boyfriend accidentally left on the bathroom sink! She then proceeded to put it in an envelope and write a little note that read "Darci, I think this is yours..." and TAPED it to the TV in my bedroom! Yeah...that was fun.

Sorry, I'm not sorry..... but, my best friend once:
had to first clean up my Sour Apple Pucker and Chicken Strip vomit, then change my panties for me because I had puked all up in my crotch, but at least I dodged her parent's brand new carpet, and lastly she held my hand and rubbed my hair until I passed out! Did I mention we were FOURTEEN! 

Sorry, I'm not sorry..... but, I once had this boyfriend that:
cried...a lot! I mean, I just can't...

Sorry, I'm not sorry..... but, if I had to name my last relationship after a movie I have seen it would for sure be:
that one movie...where the guy goes out, gets white boy wasted and I end up getting a phone call from a chick asking for him! Then he doesn't come home, I drink all the bourbon in the freezer and drunk dial all my man friends to inform them that said boyfriend was an ass hat and that I was 99% sure he was out F'n some randoms, then pass the F out brown girl wasted! Best part was...he knocked that random up! What's that movie called? Oh, that's right MY LIFE! 

Sorry, I'm not sorry..... but, after a long hard day the first thing I think about doing is:
taking off my bra...I mean, If I'm wearing one! I didn't pay the big bucks to still have to wear a bra every damn day!

Sorry, I'm not sorry..... but, they just opened a new can of crazy when I saw them:
double dip in the Mother F'n cheese dip. It literally bothers me SO much that I have to request my OWN little bowl at restaurants so that I can have myself a little piece of heaven, otherwise known as non double dipped queso! I mean, how hard is it?! We're all adults here people, get it together! One chip = One dip! It's really just simple math!

Sorry, I'm not sorry..... but, I secretly love:
the feeling of peeling my face off after I have a peel done! You know, it's similar to having a sunburn that peeling. If you deny that you get a little excited when you get that one piece of skin that just seems to "peel" forever when you pull on it!? It's the strangest, but slightly enjoyable feeling...maybe ever!

Sorry, I'm not sorry..... but, yesterday I:
pretended to be "sleeping" when The Husband came to bed! Eh, we ALL do that one!

Sorry, I'm not sorry..... but, every time I see this picture I seriously can not help but bust out laughing.

Sorry, I'm not sorry..... but, at the gym I sometimes:
check out the other women! Let's be real honest, this isn't a's an all the time! We all do it, if you say you don't, well then you are big G damn liar! It's totally normal, right?! I mean, it is...totally normal...right?

Sorry, I'm not sorry..... but, on my playlist I sometimes jam to:
Crazy Bitch by Buckcherry and just reflect on how much my ex's, and maybe my husband, must hate me! Ha!

Sorry, I'm not sorry..... but, sometimes I pretend that:
I'm not a total Bitch, but it usually only lasts about 30 seconds...on the average! But at least I'm a funny Bitch!? Eh, either way!

That's all the questions for this round! Now, get your link up on! Don't forget to check out Michelle's page HERE for the actual link up do-dad deal! 


  1. Bahahahahahahahahahaha Oh. My. Gosh...... Your condom story... My dad laid a dildo on my pillow, it wasn't mine, a best friend of mine asked to to hold her fun box of goods while she moved bc her parents were helping her.. soooo it was under my bed and my 5 year old brother found it and took it to my dad trying to shoot him with it like a gun ( it was the rabbit ) and at dinner he was like soooo how are things? Hahahaha

  2. Absolutely. Hilarious.

  3. Too funny . . . all of it! And that song by Buck Cherry . . . I love it and hope my kids never find it on my iTunes account!!

  4. These are the reasons I love you! I TOTALLY crack up over that picture too!!!