Thursday, October 10, 2013

The Joys Of Pregnancy...

Today Erin over at Homemade Happenings is guesting!  If you don't follow Erin yet, you will after you read her post today!  I laughed so hard and kept saying "that is so true" the entire way through!  Enjoy!
 
 
Hi, I’m Erin! I blog over at Homemade Happenings. Usually I’m writing about my day to day life which includes my husband, Andy, of 11 years or our two boys, Aiden age 7 and Brennan age 4. I also blog about yummy recipes I make and show off my crafting goodies which include scrapbooking, card making and holiday/homemade gifts. Lately I’ve been doing a lot of blogging about pregnancy because, well, I’m pregnant! Baby is due February 16th! I have some of the easiest pregnancies known to man, err, WO-man, but today I thought I’d write about some of the ‘fun’ that goes along with being pregnant.
These are the ‘joys’ of pregnancy:
· Mom Farts. Let me explain. You know when you were 20 and you could sit down to go potty and just potty? Yea, well, when you get pregnant you don’t just go potty when you sit down. You also let out a mom fart. All of that pressure on everything from having that baby in there taking up all that space makes that little toot just pop out! The first time I did it, with my first pregnancy, I couldn’t believe it! I mean, I’d heard other women do it while in a public restroom but I just thought they were gassy. Then I sat down and let one rip and I thought ‘Well holy hell! What did I just do? Where did it come from?? I didn’t feel it coming!” Yea, Mom Farts.
· Once you hit about 25 weeks (give or take) getting out of bed or off the couch becomes an exercise all in itself. And if you’re lying flat on your back? Forget it! You lay there like a cockroach dying, legs and arms flailing trying to get enough motion built up that you miraculously roll over and live to scurry about for another day.
· Once you hit the 3rd trimester you might as well say goodbye to shaving your legs and maintaining your …. nether regions. Your belly is so big that you can’t see around it. I have a friend who one time was doing acrobatics trying to shave her legs and ended up nicking her nipple with her razor. Youch! To me it’s not worth it. If your doctor can’t handle getting a little road rash while helping you deliver she/he shouldn’t be in that profession.
· Acne. Of all forms and in all areas. Depending on who you are you can get acne about anywhere during pregnancy. Your hormones are all fired up and you’re like a hormonal teenager all over again (minus the tiny waist and perky boobs). Acne on the face. Acne on the chest. Acne on the back. Acne on the shoulders. Forget about wearing cute, cool, comfortable tank tops! Invest in turtlenecks and face masks.
· Smells. Yes, you get smelly, and by smelly I mean you stink. Not all the time, but when you do work up a sweat trying to get off the bed you should just head straight to the shower and scrub your arm pits! Suave Clinical Strength deodorant does the trick. (Side bar: Trying going through this as a hair stylist. How many times did I lay someone back in my shampoo bowl only to wonder if I was gassing them out by my stench? Talk about embarrassing!)
Now, just because these joys of pregnancy don’t sound so swell doesn’t mean the rest of the pregnancy stuff isn’t super great! I mean, what’s neater than feeling your little one bouncing around in there? And the first time you hold them? Sigh, stenches, pimples and flailing were a small price to pay! 
Thanks to Darci for asking me to guest post! She’s one of my all-time favorite bloggers. No one can compete with her Vlogs and sassy posts! I hope you stop by Homemade Happenings and say hello to me! I love making new friends!

Erin

Seriously, I agree with everything Erin wrote...except one...I totally made The Husband do my WO-man scaping for me!  It was hilarious, but I just couldn't...I kept picturing the women on the Birthing Class videos with their 1980's bush-fro's!  I mean, no!  Just no!  LOL!  Make sure to go say hello to Erin, you won't regret it!
 
xoxo

11 comments :

  1. Hilarious...and so true... I don't miss being pregnant thats for sure.. Erin you may have gotten rid of some readers baby fever. lol

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  2. You hit the nail on this Erin!!

    All reasons why I was not a very good pregnant person!

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  3. LOL!!! I totally thought of the 80's bushes too!!! But I was too afraid Andy would nick 's/t' and that would be worse than them seeing me 'grown out'!!! Thanks again for letting me guest on here!!!

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  4. LOL!!! I totally thought of the 80's bushes too!!! But I was too afraid Andy would nick 's/t' and that would be worse than them seeing me 'grown out'!!! Thanks again for letting me guest on here!!!

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  5. This was amazing and very informative to us wanna-be mommies! Hahaha

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    1. Hope I didn't scare you away! It's not ALL Mom farts and stinkiness! :)

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  6. Oh gosh. I'm never having kids now. Thanks Erin. Hahaha!!

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  7. Mom farts! bwhahaha that's legit! I used to blame the stink on my "son", sometimes I still do..hahah too bad he's almost 19 months and usually not in the room :)

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  8. Oh the mom farts. It's amazing the amount of gas. And I totally thought fur bikini. Eekkk

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